Gay Relationship Advice

  • gay-relationships-race-play-kinkster-mag

    Race Play – When He Suddenly ‘Turned Me Off’

    I can remember that night like it was yesterday. The guy was hot, a fantasy come true. He was tall, bearded, blue-eyed, with a full head of hair, silver to be exact. Damn, the moment he walked in I was ready to strip down at the front door, but...
  • gay-relationships-hook-up-apps

    How to Score a Date After a Hook Up

    Meeting online via a hook-up app has become extremely commonplace, but many of us still get confused when we meet someone online who we end up liking. Some of us do not know how to appropriately switch from hook-up to date. When it comes to dating especially meeting guys...
  • The Grid: Lessons from the Men of Grindr

    If you have ever dated, doing the online thing or not, you will be able to relate to the stories of Lex, Esq. in his recently self-published book The Grid: Lessons from the Men of Grindr. In it Lex has identified three early and impactful relationships from which he...
  • Gay, Racism, LGBTQ, Internet Dating

    ‘Racism in Gay Dating?!?’ Will it Ever Go Away?

    As an African-American Black Gay male, I have experienced “I don’t date black men” or even worse, I’ve seen dozens of profiles with “NO BLACKS” plastered on them, and it is true, white gay men (NOT ALL), will defend their right to post that on their profiles because it’s...
  • Kinkster MAG, Valentine's Day, Gay Relationship Advice,

    Is Valentine’s Day for Lovers Only?

    I popped into Duane Reade recently and that candy isle filled with pink and red hearts has reappeared. Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. As I started to reflect on what’s in store for me this year, I’ve learned there is a growing trend to reframe Valentine’s Day...
  • Dr Tony Ortega, #IsHeHereYet, Book, Gay Dating Advice

    #IsHeHereYet: A Heartfelt Guide To Loving Yourself and Finding the Love You Want

    If you are looking for a book that offers an incredibly authentic approach to improve your relationships and life, I highly recommend reading #IsHeHereYet by Dr. Tony Ortega, a licensed clinical psychologist, and life coach serving the LGBTQ community in his private practice located in Brooklyn, New York. Finally,...
  • Ask Jade, Jade Elektra

    ASK JADE: The Truth About Cheaters

    Jade, I recently found out my boyfriend was hooking up with guys on BarebackRT, and I wanted so badly to forgive him but can’t get past it. I want things to go back the way they were, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him writing those messages, having sex...
  • Gay Relationship Advice

    Perfection is the Enemy of Love

    Sorry to break it to you, there is no such thing as finding the perfect man. I had a chat with someone recently who is in a relationship but for some reason finds himself going outside the relationship to party and have sex (PNP). But during his hook-ups, he...
  • Gay Relationship Advice

    STOP Talking About Your Ex!

    When you’re on a date, and you’re archaically waiting for the ultimate-date question of death something is wrong. You are either avoiding something or just not ready to commit to the process of dating and to get to know someone new. The question we all hate and would like...
  • Gay Relationship Advice

    Becoming Friends with Your Ex Ain’t Easy but is Possible

    Becoming besties with your ex can be painful and complicated at first but the payoff can be great. Many wonder if gay men can be best friends with their ex when the relationship ends. I’m a testament that it can happen, albeit after some time and work. For roughly...
  • Gay Dating Advice, Love at First Sight

    Love at First Sight, Is It Possible?

    I’ve been thinking about the idea of love at first sight recently and whether or not it’s possible. The way gay men hook-up and meet potential love interests has dramatically changed over the years making it simpler to connect to have sex, but pursuing someone beyond chatting or a...
  • Spirituality, The Art of Saying No, Communication Skills, Gay Relationship Advice,

    “No.” Is A Complete Sentence: Say It & Mean It

    The statement “No is a complete sentence” is something I embraced seconds after hearing it from Judith Orloff, a renowned writer on the spiritual awakening of oneself. We all struggle with a 2-letter word not because it’s easy to say but because it’s robust and incredibly efficacious that we avoid...
  • Gay Dating Advice, Relationships, Gay Men

    Seeing Potential, Two Sides to the Story

    “He has potential” is a statement we’ve either said or heard when dating someone. Strangely my cousin and I were chatting the other day about relationships and how we date people who have potential. During our conversation, we both came to the conclusion that dating someone who has goals...
  • Gay Relationship Advice, Gay Men, Gay Friendships

    When A Friend Hides a Secret From You

    Secrets and lies are a common practice in our society, just look at our current Administration. Don’t worry, discussing the current political climate is not the point of my article. Secrets and lies among friends are what this article addresses. Recently, a close business associate of mine from Aviance...
  • Books to read, Gay relationship Advice, 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

    The Secret to Love that Lasts

    Why is love so complicated? Whether we’re in love, falling out of love or just longing for a new love the idea of love is something that does not come quickly or easy. When you find it, maintaining the essence of love is one of the most arduous tasks...
  • crystal meth, drug addiction, gay men and sex, gay relationships

    A Black Man’s Life After Crystal Meth

    Addiction is a complex topic and especially when you’re completely free from the disease. Addiction is a bitch, and it’s nothing to take lightly. However, it wasn’t until someone asked me, “what’s life like after crystal meth,” that I almost had a panic attack. The question causes a panic...
  • Gay Dating Advice, Relationship Tips,

    Size Matter?

    Do size and shape really matter? Most of us would probably say no in the grand scheme of our relationships, but when it comes down to pure satisfaction in the bedroom, I bet that answer would change. We’ve all said, “it’s not the size of the ship, but the...
  • Gay in the Military, Gay Men, Coming Out

    Advice to a Gay Soldier Returning to Civilian Life

    Recently I had to deal with a soldier still in the military who needed a little realistic advice from me – to cool down his naive expectations about the life he wanted – as he prepared to become a civilian. This is what I said to him: This is...
  • Recovery, Drugs, Alcohol

    Dealing With the Twisted Fate of Sex After Drugs and Alcohol

    The after effects of alcohol or chemical addiction can be traumatizing and may create fluctuating emotions and thoughts about sex, love, friendships, and how one goes about living without the negative substance and possibility the people connected to the source of addiction. Crystal meth was my drug of choice...
  • Gay Dating, Same-sex Relationships, Dating Tips,

    5 Steps to Prepare for a New Relationship

    The new year always sparks the love bug in me, and I am not the only one. A lot of guys at the beginning of the year reflect and think about finding love. However, finding love can be a challenge in the age of technology, and everybody is interested...
  • Gay Dating Relationship Advice, Gay Men, Communication Skills, Text Messaging

    Stop Texting Him And Start Calling

    Texting is no longer a trend but a way of life. Lately, I have been chatting with several friends who each say they are interested in a guy but they have arrived in the land of confusion because all they do is text one another. One of those friends...
  • gay relationships, pathology and relationships, Break-Ups

    The Pathology of Relationships and Breakups

    Fuck, why are relationships complicated? And why is it even harder to let go of them when they become toxic or unhealthy? A close friend of mine who is heterosexual and married is struggling with ending her relationship; a relationship, in my opinion, that was over a long time...
  • Gay Hook Up Apps

    Hook Ups, One-Night-Stands No Longer Anonymous

    Before the age of online dating and social networking apps, gay bars were the go-to place for gay men to meet other gay men and potentially hook-up. Nightclubs, community centers, and other social events where hundreds of thousands of gay men felt a sense of community have also been...
  • Summer Bae, Sashay Away?

    As the summer winds down, you may be wondering what is going to happen with your summer fling (flings, if you’re nasty). After all, the summer is a season based on rather shallow ideals. We tend to look the hottest we look all year, we are the most fun...
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