If you have ever dated, doing the online thing or not, you will be able to relate to the stories of Lex, Esq. in his recently self-published book The Grid: Lessons from the Men of Grindr. In it Lex has identified three early and impactful relationships from which he attempts to unearth answers and extract information.
I’ve watched Lex’s blog “The Problem Gays” grow over the years and I’ve always found him to be informative and insightful so I was excited to read The Grid. Lex started “The Problem Gays” blog in 2016 as a passion project to discuss LGBTQ+ topics. He has been fearless in challenging the culture of dating and the men who date. His followership grew and they became more engaged. We loved his work so much he even wrote a few articles for Kinkster MAG. The Grid is Lex’s first book and foray into a long-form exploration of the issues he discusses online.
In The Grid, Lex writes with a relatable tone as if he’s talking to you like a friend. He shares his stories of meeting guys from Grindr. They are unique tales about how they met, what transpired in the relationship, and where he was at during that point in his life. Lex also outlines what he learned from each of the relationships he tells you about. He reflects on each one and calls it like he sees it.
The Grid provides a clear perspective of the dating world. This voice is one that the LGBTQ community needs. Lex is realistic and vulnerable ultimately leading us to a point of reflection and empowerment by sharing his lessons learned from each relationship.
Even if you don’t date or use dating apps, you might learn a thing or two from reading The Grid. One Amazon reviewer commented, “Though I am in a 18 year relationship and have never been a part of the Grindr scene, I found the experiences and lessons very helpful in giving me insights on my own past dating experiences. The things he encountered and the dating lessons he learned were not that different than my own from the days of the gay chat rooms. His observations gave me long needed clarity into many of the mistakes I made and helped heal a few wounds that were left gaping from years ago. The book has given me new perspectives on the dynamics of my current relationship as well. I truly believe that every gay man could learn something from this book.”